CHILD RAPE & ABUSE
IMPACT OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ON CHILDREN

Effects of Domestic Violence on Children

* What it is like for Children to Grow Up in Violent Homes?
* The Impact on Children Witnessing Parental Violence
* Domestic Violence and Its Potential Effect on Children

  • 70% of men who abuse their female partners also abuse their children. (Arbitrell Bowker and McFerron, "On the Relationship Between Wife Beating and Child Abuse", Feminist Perspectives an Wife Abuse, Kersti Yllo and Michelle Bogard, eds. 1988)
  • Nearly 70% of children who go to shelters for battered women are victims of abuse or neglect. (Jean I Layzer. Barbara D. Goodson and Christine Delange "Children in Shelters", Response. Volume 9, Number 2, 1986)
  • 3.3 million children in the United States, aged 3 to 17 years, are at risk of exposure to marital violence. (Peter Jaffe, David Wolfe and Susan Kaye Wilson (1990) "Children of Battered Women." Newbury Park. CA: Sage Publications)
  • Studies of abused children show that nearly half have mothers who are also abused, making wife abuse the single strongest identifiable risk for child abuse. (Lenore Walker, Ed.d "The Battered Woman Syndrome," New York: Springer Publishing Company, IDC. 1979)  
  • In 1992, in the USA, an estimated 1,261 children died from abuse or neglect -  more than 3 children died each day in the United States as a result of maltreatment. (National Committee for Prevention of Child Abuse, 1993)  
  • In a study of juvenile offenders, 63% of those incarcerated for murder had killed the men who had beaten their mothers. (Peggy Sissel. Public Education Coordinator with the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, USA)
    A comparison of delinquent and non delinquent youth found that a history of family violence or abuse was the most significant difference between the two groups. (G. Miller (1989) "Violence By and Against America's Children", Journal of Juvenile Justice Digest, XVII (12). p.6)
    B    oys who witness family violence are more likely to batter their female partners as adults than boys raised in non-violent homes. Girls who witness their mother's abuse have a higher rate of being battered as adults. ("Battered Families...Shattered Lives", Georgia Department of Human Resources. Family Violence Teleconference Resources Manual, January 1992)
  • Children in homes where domestic violence occurs are physically abused or seriously neglected at a rate 1500% higher than the national average in the general population. (National Woman Abuse Prevention Project, Washington, D.C.)  
  • As violence against women becomes more severe and more frequent in the home, children experience a 300% increase in physical violence by the male batterer. (M Strauss and R. Gelles, "Physical Violence in American Families." 1990)
  • Children from violent families can provide clinicians with detailed accounts of abusive incidents their parents never realized they had witnessed. (Peter Jaffe, David Wolfe and Susan Kaye Wilson (1990) Children of Battered Women. Newbury Park. CA: Sage Publications)
  • Batterers may abduct their children as a way of retaliating against their former spouses or partners. In more than half of the kidnappings of children by parents in the USA, the abductions occur in the context of domestic violence. In most cases, parents who are searching for their child, abducted by the other parent, are white, female, have reported a history of domestic violence and are the custodial parent. (Geoffrey Greif and Rebecca Hegar, "When Parents Kidnap: The Families Behind the Headlines", 272, 1992)  
  • Sixty-two percent of sons over age 14 were injured when they attempted to protect their mothers from attacks by abusive male partners. Interviews with children living in battered women's shelters show that, within a one year period, 85% of these children  had stayed twice with friends or relatives, and 75% over age 15 had run away at least twice. (Maria Roy, "Children in the Crossfire," 1988)
  • In homes where domestic violence occurs, fear, instability, and confusion replace the love, comfort, and nurturing that children need. Children live in constant fear of physical harm from the person who is supposed to care for and protect them. They may feel guilt at loving the abuser or blame themselves for causing the violence. ("Domestic Violence, Understanding A Community Problem", National Woman Abuse Prevention Fund)

What's It Like for Children to Grow Up in Violent Homes?

Chaos
The children never know what to expect at home. Their parents' moods  change quickly from loving to enraged.

Fear and Tension
The daily anger and violence create a living nightmare for the children. They may grow up being afraid of everything and trusting no one.

Danger
Often, they're the intended victim of one or both parents. Other times, they get caught in the middle and are hurt -- or killed -- "by accident."

Confusion
The children often receive mixed messages. At school, they learn that hitting is wrong. At home they learn that hitting is used to solve problems and keep a person in line.

Isolation
Often, an abusive parent shuts off the family from the outside world, and the children may withdraw from their peers and other adults, too.

Hopelessness
Children often blame themselves for the violence, but they may feel powerless to prevent, stop or escape from it.

Development of Love-Hate Relationship
They may feel protective of an abused parent, but may also resent him or her for not stopping the abuse.
Sometimes, they may feel close to the abuser; other times, they may hope he or she goes away or dies.
They may feel guilty for not being able to rescue their family -- or not loving someone who is abusive.
How Family Violence Affects Children. A Scriptographic Product. 1996 "Domestic Violence and its Silent Witnesses." Child Advocate Fall 1994. Mindee Scott CAPSA Children's Service Coordinator

The Impact on Children Witnessing Parental Violence

  • One study demonstrated that some fathers deliberately arrange for the children to witness the violence. (Violence Against Wives New York: Free Press (1979)) 
  • Girls whose fathers batter their mothers are 6.5 times more likely to be sexually assaulted by their fathers than girls from non-violent homes. (Perspectives On Wife Abuse Newbury Park, CA: Sage) 
  • Seventy-five percent of the boys who witness parental abuse have demonstrable behavioral problems. (Canadian Journal of Behavioral Science Review Vol. 4, pp. 356-366) 
  • In one study, 85 percent of the children witnessing domestic violence admitted to a drinking problem which started as early as age 11; 2 percent at age 9. (Children in the Crossfire: Violence in the home. How does it affect our children? Health Communications, Inc. 53-164) 
  • Being abused or neglected as a child increased the likelihood of arrest as a juvenile by 53 percent, as an adult by 38 percent, and for a violent crime by 38 percent. (National Institute of Justice (NIJ). Research in Brief, Oct. (1993))
  • In comparing children not exposed to violence as contrasted to children who witnessed violence and children who both witness and are abused, data suggests that the latter two groups are most comparable and have heightened behavioral and emotional distress compared to the former. ("Witnessing Spouse Abuse and Experiencing Physical Violence: A 'Double-Whammy'" Journal of Family Violence Vol. 2) 
  • Boys who have witnessed domestic violence are three times more likely to hit their wives than those who have not. ("Women Battering, Child Abuse, and Social Heredity: What is the Relationship?" Marital Violence, (1985)) 
  • In homes where espousal abuse occurs, children are abused at a rate 1,500 times higher than the national average. (National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (1993) "Facts on Domestic Violence" (brochure) Washington D.C.) 

Domestic Violence and Its Potential Effect on Children 

It is normal for a child of domestic violence to manifest a multitude of symptoms. Below are some common emotional, cognitive, behavioral, social and physical effects of abuse.

Emotional

  • Shame, guilt and self blame -- "I caused it" or "I should have been able to stop it."
  • Grief for family and personal losses.
  • Conflicting feelings toward parents.
  • Fear of abandonment, of expressing emotions, of the unknown, and/or personal injury.
  • Anger about violence and the chaos in their lives.
  • Depression, feelings of helplessness and powerlessness.
  • Embarrassed by the effects of abuse and the dynamics at home.

Behavioral (May be seen in opposite extremes)

  • Acting out versus withdrawing, aggressive versus passive.
  • Overachiever versus underachiever.
  • Refusal to go to school.
  • Care taking, more concern for others than self, acting as a parent substitute.
  • Lying to avoid confrontation, pretending everything is OK to avoid problems.
  • Rigid defenses (aloof, sarcastic, defensive, "black and white" thinking). _Excessive attention seeking, often using extreme behaviors. _Bed wetting and nightmares.
  • Out of control behavior, not able to set own limits or follow directions. _Reduced intellectual competency.
  • Manipulation, dependency, mood swings.

Social

  • Isolation from friends and relatives.
  • Relationships that are frequently stormy, start intensely and end abruptly. _Difficulty trusting, especially adults.
  • Poor anger management and problem solving skills.
  • Excessive social involvement to avoid home life.
  • Passivity with peers or bullying toward peers, play with peers gets exceedingly rough.
  • Engaged in exploitative relationships, either as perpetrator or victim.

Physical

  • Somatic complaints, headaches and stomach aches.
  • Nervous, anxious, and short attention spans, frequently misdiagnosed as being Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder.
  • Tired and lethargic.
  • Frequently ill.
  • Poor personal hygiene.
  • Regression in development, thumb sucking, etc., depending on age. _Desensitization to pain.
  • High risk play and activities.
  • Self abuse.
  • Adolescent eating disorders, substance abuse, suicide, delinquency.

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