CHILD
RAPE & ABUSE
TELL TALE SIGNS OF
CHILD ABUSE
From: Woman Help
Child sexual abuse has been reported up
to 80.000 times a year, but the number of unreported instances is far
greater, because the children are afraid to tell anyone what has happened,
and the legal procedure for validating an episode is difficult.
The problem should be identified, the abuse stopped, and the child should
receive professional help. The long-term emotional and psychological
damage can be devastating.
Child sexual abuse can take place within the family, by a parent,
step-parent, sibling or other relative; or outside the home, for example,
by a friend, neighbor, child care person, teacher or random molester.
However, when the sexual abuse has occurred, the child develops a variety
of distressing feeling and thoughts.
No child is psychologically prepared to cope with repeated sexual
stimulation. Even a two or three year old, who cannot know the sexual
activity is "wrong", will develop problems resulting from the inability to
cope with the overstimulation.
The child of five or older who knows and cares for the abuser becomes
trapped between affection or loyalty for the person, and the sense that
the sexual activities are terribly wrong. If the child tries to break away
from the sexual relationship, the abuser may threaten the child with
violence or loss of love. When sexual abuse occurs within the family
members, or be afraid the family will break up if the secret is told.
A child who is the victim of prolonged sexual abuse usually develops low
self-esteem, a feeling of worthlessness and an abnormal perspective on
sexuality. The child may become withdrawn and mistrustful of adults, and
can become suicidal.
Some children who have been sexually abused have difficulty relating to
others except on sexual terms. Some sexually abused children become child
abusers or prostitutes, or have other serious problems when they reach
adulthood.
Often there are no physical signs of child abuse, or signs that only a
physician con detect, such as changes in the genital or anal area.
The behavior of sexually abused children
may include:
- Unusual interest in or avoidance of all things of a sexual nature.
- Sleep problems or nightmares.
- Depression or withdrawal from friends or family.
- Seductiveness.
- Statements that their bodies are dirty or damaged, or fear that there is
something wrong with them in the genital area.
- Refusal to go to school, delinquency.
- Secretiveness.
- Aspects of sexual molestation in drawings, games, fantasies.
- Unusual aggressiveness.
- Suicidal behavior.
- Other severe behavior changes.
- Child sexual abusers can make the child
extremely fearful of telling, and only when a special effort has helped
the child to feel safe, can the child talk freely. If a child says that he
or she has been molested, parents should stress that what happened was not
the child's fault. Parents should seek a medical examination and
psychiatric consultation.
These are some preventive measures parents can take:
- Tell children that "if someone tries to
touch your body and do things that make you feel funny, say NO to that
person and tell me right away".
- Teach children that respect does not mean blind obedience to adults and
to authority; for example, don't tell children to "Always do everything
the teacher or baby-sitter tells you to do".
- Encourage professional prevention programs in the local school system.
Sexually abused children and their families need professional evaluation
and treatment. Child and adolescent psychiatrists can help abused children
regain a sense of self-esteem, cope with feelings of guilt about the
abuse, and begin the process of overcoming the trauma. Such treatment can
help reduce the risk that the child will develop serious problems as an
adult.
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