Inspiration
The Path to Love - Practical Suggestions:

1. Look at the following list of things that love is supposed to accomplish:
Love is meant to:
Heal
Renew
Make us safe
Inspire us with its power
Make us certain, without doubt
Oust all fear
Unveil immortality
Bring peace
Harmonise differences
Bring us closer to God

Even if this list strikes you as unrealistic, make a bargain with love - a soul bargain - that any or all of these things will come true for you. Take a piece of paper and write down what you want from love. It is a real force, if it is attuned to who you are, love will respond. Make your list as complete and specific as you can. Write down every entry from the receding list and beside it list what you want e.g.
Love is meant to heal: I want to heal my anger toward my father.
Love is meant to renew: I want to feel renewed enthusiasm for my work.

Once you are satisfied that you have detailed everything you want, the bargain is complete. Put the piece of paper in a safe place. You have announced to your soul what you want, and it is up to love to respond. Love is intelligent and aware. It knows you better than you know yourself - therefore it has the power to fulfill its side of the bargain. Don't dwell on your list or try to make it come true. The only thing you need to do, is when you feel love, act on it. Speak your heart. Be truthful. Remain open. This is how you align yourself with love. At the end of a few months, take out your list and read it over. Ask yourself how much has come true - you may be surprised.

Actually asking for love is one of the most difficult things for anyone to risk, and by risking it first in your heart, you open a door that will never close again.
(Taken from The Path to Love, by Deepak Chopra)

2. Make a list of your qualities - positive and negative. Start with aspects of your physical body that you like and dislike and continue with emotional characteristics that you perceive as positive or negative. Usually, the list of negative qualities outweighs the positive. Remind yourself of things that people have told you about yourself - things that are positive, but that you have never allowed yourself to assimilate/integrate or believe. Look at people you admire - what is it about them that you admire? The only reason you recognize this quality in someone else is because it is an inherent part of you - you wouldn't recognize it otherwise. Add these qualities to your list. Consider the people who irritate you the most - what is it about them that upsets you? Possibly this is an aspect of yourself that you would rather not integrate? Maybe the reason this person annoys you is because they reflect a quality within you that you perceive as flawed? Everyone around you is a mirror - it is far easier to identify things in other people than to recognize them in ourselves.

Once you have made this list spend time dwelling on each quality. Integrate the negative - our strength lives in knowing our vulnerabilities - and appreciate the positive. Every morning when you look in the mirror instead of focusing on all the things you would like to change, find one positive characteristic that you admire. It may be as simple as the texture of your skin or the colour of your eyes. At the end of the day, reflect on the day' s events and find one thing that you did/ said or experienced that day, which makes you feel good about who you are. Focus on the positive instead of dwelling on the negative.

3. Divide a page into 4 columns - Physical/ Emotional/Mental/ Spiritual. Consider each heading and make a list of things that you can do to start taking care of yourself on each of these levels.
Physical: What things are good for my body What else can I do to make my body feel good? E.g. Nutrition, exercise, sleep, massage..
Emotional: What things make my heart feel good? When last did I experience that warm feeling in my heart and what can I do to recreate that feeling? It is NB that these activities do not involve finding other people to help you get that feeling, but that they are things you can do on your own; things you can do for yourself. E.g. watching the sunset/ listening to music/ reading inspirational stuff.
Mental: Am I striking a balance between creative and intellectual stimulation? If my work is very intellectually stimulating or stressful - what can I do to help balance this for myself? If I spend a lot of time in leisure activities and I am often bored, then maybe I need to find something intellectually stimulating to do? If my mind is over stressed on an intellectual and creative level - am I making time to rest? E.g. taking a new course, new hobby, anything you have always wanted to do but have never made time for. Something different to your usual daily routine.
Spiritual: What does spirituality mean to me? Is it about religion or prayer? Is it about meditation or yoga? Is it about quiet time for self-contemplation and setting goals and intents for myself? Am I in touch with this aspect of myself? What else could I be doing to reconnect with this aspect of who I am?

Once you have made this list set aside time to start doing these things for yourself. It is very important that you learn to take care of yourself if you are to love unconditionally. Often, there is a perception that making time to do these things for yourself, or thinking about yourself in this way is selfish. If you cannot love yourself unconditionally, if you cannot treat yourself or touch yourself the way a lover would, how will you ever allow anyone else to love you unconditionally? How will you be able to love someone else unconditionally?

Someone else's needs are never more or less important than your own - they are equally important. Within the context of what your situation/partnership/ relationship demands of you, what it is that you expect for yourself? Find the middle ground and establish the boundaries that allow for you to have time and space to do the things that reaffirm your commitment to yourself. Taking care of someone else's needs at the expense of your own is self-destructive, and possibly denies the other person an opportunity to learn and grow. If you are in doubt about a personal choice that may complicate life for another or cause someone you love pain, ask yourself what your underlying motive is. Are you doing this to hurt the person, because if you do you may need to reassess your choices, or are you doing it because you are hurting and you understand that this must change? If it is the latter, then despite the fact that someone else may be hurt by your choices, know that it is appropriate and that those choices may force the other person to confront an aspect of their own lives that they may need to address.

This list is something that you will need to reassess periodically. As you develop self-awareness, you may identify different needs or activities that will help you to move to the next level - life is a journey that is constantly unfolding. Unconditional love is the ultimate potential.

Suggested reading:
1. The path to love - Deepak Chopra
2. The mastery of love - Don Miguel Ruiz
3. The Invitation - Oriah Mountain Dreamer
4. How to know God - Deepak Chopra
5. In the Meantime - Iyanla Vanzant
6. Yesterday, I cried - Iyanla Vanzant
7. Proud of Me - Charlene Smith
8. Conversations with God, Books 1,2,3 - Neale Donald Walsh
9. Why people don't heal and how they can - Caroline Myss
10. Anatomy of the spirit - Caroline Myss
11. Something More - Sarah Ban Breathnach