Readers' Speakout

READERS SPEAKOUT
I was raped and no-one cares, 21 March 2006

WITH OUT PREDJUCE

I FIRMLY BELIEVE THAT THERE IS LOTS OF CORRUPTION IN THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENTS

Attached here is a letter that I sent to the Minister of justice on the 25 October 2005. I also approachad some of the NGO's but they did not help in anyway. Sometimes I feel I do not speak english anymore as no one seems to be hearing me , sympathizing with me, or offering any assistance. This has added to my initial trauma and depression. It also hurts that my case which has simularities to Zumas is being refused court while Zumas alledged victim gets the head of the DPP, a senior counsel, and a state advocate to represent her while I get ignored.My rapist is also a very wealthy man. I am a single parent with two dependants.I have been suffering from severe depression since the rape and have not been able to work properly. I have been living off my savings and cant afford a good lawyer.The state who should have provided me with a proscecuter/ lawyer has not done so. My rapist has been getting legal advice from the infamous Adv. Dirk Uijs. It is not fair.

Please pass this letter on to a reporter.

SpeakOut!
I am a reporter and a rape survivor. On the website we state clearly that we don't open attachments because of virus fears - if you want me to have a look at this, or indeed any other journalist you need to cut and paste and give you name and contact details. No-one can or will touch anything that is anonymous.

If you are making a claim of corruption you need to substantiate this and give proof - you may have done this in the attachment.

Please don't call him "my" rapist, banks don't refer to robbers as "my robber" - refer to him as "the rapist" - distance him from you. The person in Zuma's case did not get senior counsel, only a state prosecutor.

There are two things you need to do - one send us the details in the body of an email and either I, or another journalist will have a look at it. Perhaps someone in Cape Town as it appears you live there.

Laying a rape charge is not an easy process and it is even harder to get it to court - we've all been through it. In my case they lost all the dockets within a week, showed no interest in arresting him despite him phoning me 3 or 4 times a day after the rape, and the trial almost went out of the window right toward the end because they had not bothered to complete chain of evidence with the forensic material which is crucial to convict them.

So let me tell you some things based from someone who has been through this and has helped hundreds of others. You've got to cut the victim approach no-one will help you if you don't pull yourself together and start pushing hard and in a calm dignified way.
To say that the rapist is getting legal advice is not "unfair" as you put it, it is to be expected.
You have two children and are a single mother - what effect is this having on your children them seeing you as a wreck and in not doing well at work? You can't afford to mess up at work because if you lose your job you and your children suffer more and that won't be the fault of the rapist, it will be your fault. Your fault only. You are choosing to allow him to win by destroying your life - why are you doing that?
Why are you punishing your children? They love you and must be incredibly concerned, you need to set them a strong and positive example of how people get over bad things that happen to them, if you don't you will increase their anxiety levels and their fears making them vulnerable. I bet they are not doing great at school since this (if they are at school). By being a victim you are punishing your children. You can't do this, you can't let the rapist rule your life.
Send me the details of the case, all the details including case number, investigating officer, police station, date of offence, date charge laid - name of accused and details of what happened and I will give you help in telling you who to go to who will help you with the case. But I'm telling you this too, if you don't pull yourself together you will perform badly on the witness stand and he will walk free - this requires great strength and from your letter you are not displaying it.
I will also give you the names of counsellors for you and your kids. All the services I will note will give you free assistance.
I'm being tough on you, but this comes with lots of love and concern and years of experience. If you want to get him sent to jail or be punished then you have to be strong and dignified... and that in the end is your greatest revenge where you prove to him and everyone else that no individual can destroy you, that you are greater than them. But you have to start this process now.
with love